Did you know Joshua road a motorcycle? Joshua 6:27 says his Triumph was heard throughout the land.
But God prefers Plymouths. Genesis 3:24 says God drove Adam and Eve our in a Fury
Jesus’ Apostles, however, drove a compact car, Acts 2:1 says they were all in one Accord.
The sermon title for Sunday: “Joseph: The Father of The Father’s Son”
Matthew 1:18-21; 2:13-15; Luke 2:21-24, 39-52
First Service Jokes:
1. What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
2. How do you get a country girl’s attention? A tractor.
3. Why are elevator jokes so classic and good? They work on many levels.
4. What do you call it when a group of apes start a company? Monkey business.
5. What do we call Arnold Schwarzenegger now that he’s retired? The Exterminator.
6. What did Tennessee? The same thing as Arkansas.
7. What did Delaware? Her New Jersey.
8. Which state has the most streets? Rhode Island.
9. Beth asked me to go get a 6-pack of Sprite. I realized when I got home that I had picked 7-up.
10. Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb.
11. Did you hear about the kid-napping at school? He woke up.
12. How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree? By the bark.
13. Did you hear about the man who fell down the well? He couldn’t see that well.
14. Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverlands.
15. I used to not like facial hair, but then it grew on me.
16. When does a joke become a “dad joke?” When it becomes apparent.
Second Service Jokes:
1. Sundays can be a little sad, but the day before is always a sadder day.
2. Did you know dogs can’t operate MRI machines. But catscan.
3. It takes guts to be an organ donor.
4. How does a penguin build his house? Igloos it together.
5. I told my doctor I heard buzzing, but he said it was a bug going around.
6. What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna One, Anna Two!
7. Two goldfish were in a tank. One said to the other, “Do you know how to drive this thing?”
8. If you tell dad jokes, but you don’t have any kids, that makes you a faux pa.
9. What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business.
10. What does a house wear? Address.
11. Did you hear scarecrow won an award? He was out standing in his field.
12. Lincoln asked me to put his shoes on, but I don’t think they’ll fit me.
13. Do you know why the bicycle couldn’t stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
14. People are usually shocked that I have a Police record. But I love their greatest hits!
15. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
16. I like telling Dad jokes…sometimes he laughs.
